While there’s already a section on this in my FAQ, I feel I should expand on it a little more.  Especially since there’s been such a surge in followers and, subsequently, questions regarding my academic background & reasons for it.  I’ll answer the most asked questions in detail, i.e:

  • What art school do you attend?
  • What do you study?
  • Do you like it?
  • Why do you study it? (Especially if you don’t enjoy it?)
  • What will you do afterwards?
  • What advice do you have for those struggling with with their academic/career choices/family pressure?
  • And etc.

Update: I made a vlog in response to the crazily awesome feedback I received on this post.  I’m sorry I haven’t yet had time to reply to everyone’s comments (& emails!) yet, but hopefully this will suffice for now.

What art school do you attend?

I don’t go to an art school, and I never have.  I’ve never had any formal training of any kind, and all of my knowledge/technique/whatever is entirely self-taught.  (Which is probably why everything I do is largely intuitive rather than technical!)

What do you study, then?

I am currently in my fourth year of Commerce/Laws at the University of Melbourne.  What I study is a double degree; the two components, of course, being the Bachelor of Commerce and the Bachelor of Laws.  I’m majoring in Marketing in my Commerce degree.  (We don’t have majors in Law.)  The combined degree lasts five years, but I’ll finish a little later for me as I’ve been taken some time off my Commerce degree to solely focus on (read: struggle with) Law, and to peel back the number of subjects I’m forced to endure each semester!

Do you enjoy it?

No.  It’s safe to say I absolutely abhor it, and coming to class each day is sort of unbearable.  (Which is probably why I don’t go to class most of the time. (Do not follow my example.))

Then why the hell do you do it, you crazy mongoose?

This is probably one of THE most common questions I receive.  It’s pretty complicated and I don’t want to air out all my personal details to the universe, but in a nut shell, it’s because of my parents.  

They’re very traditional Asian parents - the type who see Law as a fallback option if, for whatever reason, you’re unable to get into Medicine.  Also the type to feel pretty uneasy about any other career choice unless it promises stability and a respectable reputation.  

Escaping a war-torn country when they were just past their teen years, they’ve had to work extremely hard building up from virtually nothing to ensure me and my sister received what we do today.  And we’re really, really lucky.  I’m fortunate enough to have more than everything I would ever need, and I get a so many opportunities and love that others might not.  So it’s extremely important for them that I make the best choices for my future; or at least the choices they feel are the best.

No, they were not keen on my artwork.  (And that’s fine.  I don’t begrudge them of that.  Not everyone has to like my artwork.  Of course I would love it if they did, but that’s okay.)  And they’ve never really understood that aspect of me.  It’s very hard for them to see it more than just a hobby, and the fact I’ve been transfixed on art since my childhood is worrying, I guess!  In my earlier years, I wanted them to be proud of me, and was convinced I was going to become a brain surgeon (I know).  But as the years wore on, and I gained a vivid sense of identity, I realised that I LOVED art.  And my epiphany a couple of years ago made me realise I wanted to do this for the rest of my life.

Even though I already knew what their reactions would be, I brought this up with them anyway.  I’m sure every Asian child out there can guess how that went. :P  So, when it was time to choose our courses/universities, I had very little choice.  Having already dropped Chemistry and doing terribly in Maths, I was unable to apply for any Health Sciences (eliminating delicious choices like Medicine, Dentistry, Optometry, Pharmacy, etc).  And so, Law was my “only” option.  

My parents said they would allow me to pursue illustration as long as I finished this degree first — so that I would have a safety net.  

Unfortunately for me/them, as my passion for illustration grows stronger, my tolerance of my degree decreases exponentially.  As do my marks.  And my attendance.  Et cetera.  

Isn’t it difficult to do something you dislike so much?

Yes.  Very.  I care less and less about this degree as the years go by, and am extremely careless with all of my academic responsibilities.  Sometimes I scrape through, and sometimes I don’t.  It was also pretty difficult for me to make friends because: (1) I was never around; (2) When I was around, I seemed to only come in contact with people who felt an aggressive need to condescend my interests and goals; (3) I greatly dislike the student culture in the law faculty.

Sometimes, I remain pretty happy.  I distance myself from what I have to do, and just focus on the things that make me grateful: like my friends, my family, all that I have, all that I’m capable of doing.  People who like my art.  

Other times, I go into a really dark place and feel a deep-seated resentment.  It’s during those times that I sometimes cannot bring myself to even go to an exam, or hand in an assignment, or do anything at all.  Sometimes I think, “What’s the point?”

It’s hard coming from a history of near perfect scores and a somewhat active academic motivation, to barely passing (and sometimes failing) because I have zero motivation whatsoever.  I’m not doing well at all because I don’t put in the effort.  If I did, I would probably get out of here faster.  But I cannot bring myself to do that; all I want is to distance myself from this degree as much as possible. It’s a crappy cycle.

Why don’t you just drop out/fight back/do something wildly rebellious?

Because doing so would cost me a great, great deal.  Firstly, I’ve got a little over a year left.  Quitting now would sort of render four years of persistence void.  If I can survive, then it would mean a pretty hefty safety net if my illustrative career withers and dies.

Secondly, I would probably irreparably damage my relationship with my parents; it would hurt and disappoint them beyond recognition.  I know that they are only being overprotective out of overwhelming love for me, even if I feel it may be misguided.  They are fearful for my future.  

It’s the difference in generation, in upbringing and mindset, that prevents us from meeting eye to eye.  I think they’re trying to control my future; they think they’re guiding me towards the best life I can have.  One where I can spend freely, have the money to buy a house, to settle down, and to have significantly fewer worries.

The Vietnamese community of which I am (reluctantly) a part would also be prettttty disparaging of my career choices.  (They with their doctor/lawyer/dentist-wannabe children.)  My parents will receive a lot of backlash and so will I.  I care very little about what the larger community will say about me, but it’ll be pretty damn hard for my parents.

What about your sister?

My sister is ten years older than me, and is a successful lawyer.  She’s also my best friend and one of my biggest fans. :)  She was fortunate; she had always wanted to be a lawyer, and thus, there were few academic difficulties for her growing up.  Not that much pressure from my parents.  But she is sympathetic and supportive of me.  As a mature adult, though, she does try to maintain diplomacy between me and my parents, trying not to take overt sides.  The fact that she turned out so ‘well’ also factors into why my parents find it hard to understand that I’m going CRAZY and rebelling and whatever. One daughter is the overachiever, and the other goes wild about drawing and is failing her course. Hah.

How do you find time for your art?

I HAVE to find time for it.  It is the very thing that keeps me sane.  That is why I draw whenever I can (even if that’s not very often), and why I take on commissions, and why I envelope myself in this little world.  In my mind, I’m a full-time illustrator and a part-time student. :)  Or at least I try to be, hah.  Plus, all this drawing means that I’m slowly building up a portfolio that will hopefully be somewhat impressive, so that when I graduate I’ll actually have something to show potential institutions/employers. :P

What will you do, then?

I’m just going to try to chug along and finish this MOTHERFUDGING degree.  And when I graduate, I will hand my certificates to my parents and say, “Here. I did this for you.”  Then I’ll immediately pursue my dreams.  Whether that involves looking for a creative job, or studying some sort of art/design course, who knows?  I haven’t decided yet, all I know is that I will follow my own lead, regardless of how my parents will feel about it.  

In the meanwhile, I’ll continue to draw & take freelance work when I can. :)

And besides, life could be much worse.  I might feel trapped in a degree, but there are people dealing with raw, life-threatening situations.  People who don’t even have a choice to attend school, to even consider following their dreams.  Ultimately, I’m extremely fortunate.  I was lucky enough to get the marks to gain admission into one of the most competitive courses in our state.  My problem is only one that you’d have in a first world country: “Damn, my life sucks because my parents won’t let me pursue art and are forcing me to study a prestigious degree that I was able to get into because of my high marks, and are paying for the entire thing.”

And above all, I have a wealth of supporters.  I owe it all to my friends to keep me grounded, my fellah, my sister, and of course — all of you guys. :)  Anyone who has ever supported my art has kept me going.

Advice to others in a similar position.

While I’m a pretty resilient person and know that I’ll be able to get through this long-ass degree eventually, I would not recommend this to anyone else.  If you’re in a position where you KNOW what you want, and you CAN pursue it, then by all means — do it!  Do it, do it, do it.  Carpe diem.  Don’t stew around, don’t be lazy.  Just grab it by the groin, so to speak.

But if you’re NOT in a position to choose, or there’s just some overwhelming factors out of your control: don’t lose hope. :)  People chop and change their studies and career choices a hundred times over.  It doesn’t matter how long it takes you to get there, or how hard it may be.  I know it can be trying, but it isn’t the end of the world.  Think instead of everything that makes you grateful, that makes you feel loved; think about how lucky you are. And know that if you want something enough, you will be able to attain it.  Just believe in yourself and have faith in your ability to persevere.  It will pay off.  You’re not alone in this!

Advice to Third Parties.

Don’t tell your friends, “What are you doing? Just fight back. Just drop out. Just walk away.”  It’s never that easy.  Some people have a lot at stake.  Don’t tell your friends, “Your parents are awful human beings, how could they do this to you?”  It’s never that simple.  They’re parents, they love their children unconditionally.  They would lie down in front of a car for their children without hesitation.  It’s about misconception & misunderstandings. It’s about a generation gap and world of difference.  Be supportive and keep an open mind.  

Sorry it’s so mega long.  I hope that answers your questions, though. :)


Comments | 169 notes | Posted at 5:46PM


  1. christinepan reblogged this from ravenskar
  2. simplyhien reblogged this from ravenskar and added:
    eyes completely.
  3. raison--detre reblogged this from ravenskar and added:
    wonderful role model.